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Wednesday, October 30, 2013

I Love My Curves. Now Shut Up.

I hate you.
Like, I really really hate you.

You reminded me of all those people that constantly reminding me that I would look prettier if I shed some pounds. As if the inches I lost on my waist line will significantly correlates in reverse to the number of boys that ask my phone number. That the skinnier I am the more attractive I would be, and thus, the easier my life would be.

Oh I was there, trust me I was there. Working out so intently, cutting up my food and such, seeing how I lost the inches and able to wear thin-size dresses and shirts and jeans that I thought I would never ever had the chance to use. I loved myself, the chubby curved me, and it felt so weird to wander with a lot less lump on my chest and the saggy feeling on my behind. Yet it was awesome to finally able to use that low v-neck shirt effortlessly, and how everyone compliment me and say I did a good job with my weight loss as if it's the greatest thing I could do and give for myself. But you know what? Getting a date was still difficult. Making friends was still hard. I didn't turn into this cool desirable chick, nor become a heroine in a fancy story. I was still me, a few pounds less.

You and people like you have this imagery, this concept of what people should be, according to you. You went all the way on your crusade to make sure this concept of yours being implemented. You want your perfect world and you go all out even if you have to force people against their will. It doesn't matter if other people have their opinion, or have a story on why they are themselves. It doesn't matter if the "change" was not all they favor for. All you see is if it's not according to your standard, you will wreak havoc. All you wanted to see is everything goes according to what you wanted them to be. You are Ms. Pariah in Elvira, Mirstress of The Dark. You are Mrs. Busybody in Enid Blyton's stories. You are Chet in Weird Science. You are hideous.

My body size and shape does not meddle with my brain. It does not hinder my ability to think, my sense of humor, my compassion for others. It does not made me a better lover or a better friend, or a better person all round. If you think my health is bad due to my body shape, come and speak to me in person, state your case and tell me why the hell you think it is a good idea to made me change my shape. I'll tell you a secret: if it doesn't directly affected you and endanger you, I wouldn't even give a sh**. If I am your work partner and we did a lot of strenuous activities together, then yes, I would be happy or at least understanding on your concern to my body size because it might affect our work. But if you and I share the same office shapes with about 20 other people each in our own cubicle, then don't even think to come near me to say I look better if I shed a few inches.

I don't want to lose a few pounds. I don't want to shed a few inches. I don't want to be fairer. I don't want to have bigger breasts or plumper butt. I don't want to have straight hair. I don't want to change how I think, how I am. Maybe I would, but if I did it would be for my own reasons and not to satisfy your OCD for your "perfect world". Change yourself if you need to, if you want to, but leave me alone. Leave me f***ing alone. You don't know me. Don't judge me. Don't violate me.

1 comment:

  1. who said that something wrong with your body? Geez,I wanted to have legs and breast like yours bwahahahahaa.....


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