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Tuesday, February 25, 2014

Life 101: The Book That Taught Me Life

The door that can connect you to everywhere, the sheet that can reverse an item's condition back to its previous state (e.g. from broken to unbroken), a time machine that can take you to any time you want, the unbidden state of mind that allows you to think nothing is impossible; all these sounded pretty fantastic, don't you think? I do have to admit I have a great childhood :)

Reading has always been a passion of mine, and with those magical words and sentences I am transferred to faraway lands and adventures and all those nice things. I went out on my little bike, deliberately took a different route, and it made me feel like I was a great explorer; I took my mother's beach cloth and sat on the field having a picnic with fried tempeh and a bottle of water, wondering why it didn't feel as good as described in the book while my friends looking at me awkwardly trying to understand what the heck am I doing; I put a brick on my bike's basket and pretend it was a puppy or kitten and drove it around like the girl in the story book; I basically trying to simulate interesting things that I read, and as Cinderella would say: In my own little corner/In my own little space/I can be whatever I want to be. Yet nothing come even close to the profound impact of a specific book series that literally shape me into who I am right now: the Doraemon Manga.

Pirate ship Vs Ole-Time Train in space? Heck yes. As badass as it can be. 

The Doraemon manga is a story about a fourth grade boy who has a friend in form of cat robot from 22nd century, and how the robot help him to cope with day-to-day life. The graphic is not spectacular, nor the story line; yet there are far more life lesson that I learned from this series than any other book I read, even The Lord of The Ring series. The complete characters are, for one, are people who I can really relate to: 
- Nobita: Main character, not very bright, slow and lazy, have a kind heart but prone to temptation
- Doraemon: Main character, owned a slew of fabulous future tools and know how to use it wisely yet still got his own flaws and silliness
- Shizuka: The girl that Nobita like, kind and smart and generous but can be nagging and really jealous at times
- Giant: The big bully that will crushed anything on his way, but very loyal and can be depended on at all times
- Suneo: Small rich boy with insecurity regarding his height (he is short), he is both snobbish and cunning and like to flaunt his wealth, and always the last person to agree on helping his friends (yet he would do it wholeheartedly)
Don't we all have someone like this in our little circle of friends? And at one time we can be one of these five characters: the weak, the powerful, the angel, the bully, the elitist?

Yet the attraction of the series went far more than just the relatable characters, this series taught me almost all I need in life. For instance: it taught me about tax, how credit works, evolution, fashion, and even time paradox. It taught me the good and bad effect of flattery. It taught me about cause and effect: in one story Nobita was given a dictator switch where he can make any person he didn't like disappear, in the end he was so frustrated with people that he made everyone disappear and he was all alone in this world until Doraemon showed up and explained to him that it was actually a switch to teach dictators a lesson that nobody is dispensable. It taught me about relationship: that a man with good heart and willing to go the distance for you and his loved ones is the best man that you can find. It even taught me about adulthood: in one story Nobita's dad came home drunk and upset, and Nobita and Doraemon realized that his dad just need someone to cry to and unburden his stress just like a little child who need his/her mom to comfort him/her when the going gets a little too tough. This is the best relationship advice that I ever had, by the way. 

And after all that, they still have time to own a set of flying fish, save elephant and various wild/feral animals, going for underwater hiking and underground adventure, visiting space, say hi to Lochness Monster, swam in the bathtub as large as the ocean, and even have a jolly good hot spring vacation at home. Yes, that include the Everywhere Door, the time machine, the Reverse Cloth, and so on. They had adventures in the cloud, under the sea, in the depth of African Jungle, in the dinosaur era, robotic wars, even a dab at Arabian Night tale. All while teaching the reader about honesty, perseverance, courage, and respect; with a dab of environmental issue. What better lesson can a child get?

If you care to look and listen, you'll hear the same woes voiced by people from different countries in the world: "Our school system does not teach the children enough about life skills such as tax and credit", "The school need to educate our children about kindness and compassion", "School is useless. Period". Now, I have disagree on that because school is not a place where you can be jack-of-all-trade; instead it is an institution than helped you learn about solving problems and dealing with life (friends, superiors, deadlines). Yet if you still feel the school is failing you and your children on this, perhaps it is time to give them a different exposure. Let your children mind run free and unbidden, let them believe that nothing is impossible, help them learn about Life 101 through books and stories. Cool comics like Batman and such will always be cool, but give them something they can hold on through out their life: of kindness and compassion, of loyalty and honesty, of perseverance and respect, and most importantly, about cause and effect. And while you are at it, give yourself this gift too. Trust me, it works :)

Wednesday, February 19, 2014

The Story of Forced Attention or The Story of Leave Me Alone Please

This is a story of unrequited affection, and how uncomfortable it can be for everyone involves. Called it anti-Valentine story, but I'd rather called it "A Cautious Tale for Us All" or "Leave Me Alone, Please". 

Let's call her M. I met M through my husband, she is an old friend of him and had been a special person in my husband's life for years. My culture in Indonesia had taught me to respect elder people, and it was easy because I acknowledged that she was indeed a kind woman and one that my husband really care and adore. Yet I also acknowledged that she could be somewhat a drama queen and would demand require a good deal of attention, and if I got too close to her I could get burn. This did not impact my respect towards her, just making me extra cautious.

Then it all started.

First it was the e-mails. I ended up telling her that although I do respect her checking in on me and tried to established relationship/friendship with me, I am quiet by nature and not accustomed on communicating so intensively; plus I was still adjusting to my new life in US and I needed some time alone. Then it was the text messages. Again, I felt unease to have to answer text messages from her. A part of it because I was really not use to communicating that extensively - not even with my mom and family, we are one independent bunch - and another part because I didn't feel close to her at all that merit extensive communication. One time after a long period of no contact she send me message saying "Who is this?", which made me replied to her telling her that was my number. When I told my husband what happen, he said uneasily that it might be her way into tricking me to text her. I became less and less interested in communicating with her. Then she text me and rudely asking whether it cost money to text her. My husband tried to defuse the situation but it escalate to the point where I was rudely treated in her place when we came to visit, and followed by a lengthy letter from her which even my friend [whom I showed the letter too] exclaimed that it was really a rude letter indeed. After a while I thought it had all died down. Alas, I count my chick too soon. Just recently she texted me again and said: "For someone who does not like texting, you are pretty active in Facebook". 

Emotions are running high in me, and I don't know where to start. I feel violated. I feel betrayed. I feel unfairly judged. Who is she to force herself at me? Who is she to trick me and shame me for not accepting her "kind gesture"? She is not my mother or a part of my family. She is not my friends who had been with me through thick and thin. She does not read my writing, share the same interest with me, or have anything in common with me. She does not know me at all, nor did she express the interest to get to know me better. It was so obvious from our exchange that the thing she wanted from me was my attention, it's not about getting to know me or my well being, it was all about me giving her attention. And I refuse to fold in. I braced myself and tell myself that with her personality, sooner or later it would go down to this anyway. One wrong answer or other things that displeased her and it will go kaboom, better now than later. Yet it still made me feel so sad, as if I was the bad guy here. I do not wish to harm her, yet she forced herself to me and made me have to build this wall between us, made me have to be strict and unpleasant towards her. I don't want to harm anyone, yet she made me do it. And it breaks my heart.

If there is anything good that can be said about this whole experience, it is a reminder for myself to never, ever force my affection to someone else. And also to realize that people might not think the way we do. There are a multitude of reasons [both ones that I can easily explain and those that I couldn't explain] on why I don't feel up close and personal with this woman yet I can be like best buddies to someone I just met in Facebook; and I don't have the obligation to explain the whys to anyone. It sucks when someone is just not that interested in you like you are to him/her, but hey that's life. This is a life lesson that we probably get in our elementary school (5th or 6th grade, or even pre-school!), and in the course of life it will imposed itself again and again: rejection by a dream job you've always wanted (or any job in that matter), rejection by a cool friend you want to hang out with, rejection by the girl/boy whom you were so convinced is your true soul mate, rejection by life (e.g. not having money when you really need to buy something or go out), etc. Life is just full of disappointment, but it doesn't give you the right to hurt someone else or retaliate when faced by that disappointment. It is what make us grow, it is what make us a better person. 

I wish I could hurt her the way she hurts me, I wish I could violate her the way she violates me, but does it even matter? Even as I write this piece, my anger has subside and only the unhappiness reside. Yet that too will eventually passed, nothing in this world is forever and I would be a fool to hold grudge against her and thus making her a part of my life. Let her past, my conscience said, let her past. Her actions, lies, and interference are unpleasant and unjustifiable, and I would have to meet her again one day [and might get hurt again]; but I won't let her be a part of my life by holding grudge against her. There are other far worthier thing to do.

Thursday, February 13, 2014

Valentine Day 2014: Yahoo To The Rescue!

Dear muffin, I am hopelessly distracted by thoughts of you. Your strong square jaw has inspired a thousand works of art. When we are apart, the color is gone from the world. Your love is my north star, going me to true happiness.

Your partner/spouse/mistress/hot chick-and/or-sexy-dude-next-door-who-does-not-know-you-exist is (or are) the most important thing to you. You will give them anything, especially on special super lovey-dovey Valentine day, right? Time to book that romantic dinner at that overly-priced restaurant he/she has been nagging you about! Wait, you just blew your whole saving for that awesome bearded mug which supposedly make you the manliest man at the office and/or ridiculously uncomfortable killer heels that you bought just because a celebrity is caught wearing one and couldn't even afford a cheap wine and dine at home? And you are also allergic to flowers and have chocolate-phobia? And to top that you think this Valentine day is over-rated and you do not want to participate in such greedy corporate event, but you know you got to join the throng to get that mm-mm-you-know-what (or at least to make sure he/she wouldn't leave you for thinking you are such an unromantic asshole)? Well my friend, Yahoo has come to the rescue!!

Introducing: Yahoo special autocompose! For a limited time you can ask Yahoo to compose a special love note just for your special someone (which is probably the same thing someone else send to their special someone) for no extra charge!! Selected words include: "I am awash at the great ocean of your love" and "Your love is my north star" (for Crazy in Love), or "There should be a national holiday in your honor" (for Friendly Love), and the great passive aggressive piece of "Who needs a heart when a heart can be broken" (for Out of Love). It's a true gem and a life saver.

Here's other samples, starting from the Crazy In Love selection:

To my beloved,

Everything you do is the most perfect thing that has ever been done. The warmth of your love could protect me from the harshest winter. Your intelligence and brilliant wit bring me to my knees. I am awash in the great ocean of your love

Lovesick and dizzy with anticipation,


Dear muffin,

I am hopelessly distracted by thoughts of you. Your voice is sweeter than caramel. I love you more than the mountaintops love the horizon. If you were an animal, you'd be a blue whale because they have the largest heart of any living creature. 

Hugs and kisses times infinity,

Now on to Friendly Love....

To my big-hearted friend,

You know what's funny? Of course you do, you have a great sense of humor. Animals and babies seem to like you, and that speaks volumes about your character. You're somebody I would call if my car broke down and I needed a ride. I appreciate that your clothes always seem to be freshly pressed. 

Most sincerely,


Dear colleague,

Have I told you lately that I love you? You know, I've never seen you litter! Not once! I wish you could hear all the nice things people say about you all the time. Basically, everyone should strive to be more like you. 

With friendly love,

And here comes the heart-broken piece....

Dear Madam,

We can't run. We can't hide. Who needs hugs and kisses? Okay, me, a little bit. As far as I'm concerned, candlelit dinners are a safety concern. Who needs a heart when a heart can be broken? 

Never mind,

And the last gem....

Dear platonic Valentine,

Chocolate-shmocolate. Roses-shmoses. Love-shmove. I'm flushing every candy heart I see. Join me, won't you? It's a take-out dinner kind of day. If you need me, I'll be in the Honeymoon Suite at the Heartbreak Hotel

I want a refund,

Seriously, this is some good stuff. Especially the heart-broken ones, such passive-aggressiveness!! But then again, what else would make someone flutter than to be told their clothes are always neatly pressed and than he/she never litter? Seriously good stuff. Nay sayer would argue that you can always Google the necessary templates which would be far more superior than this poor-dimwitted-one-size-fit-them-all masterpiece, but this autocompose only need a single click! Well, technically 3: one to click on the compose button, one to click on the category, and one to click send. And you will also need to put the person's e-mail address. But hey, still easier than Googling and illegally copy-paste the templates!

Unromantic men and women everywhere, this is your savior for such dreadful day. Now let's say in unison: THANK YOU YAHOO!!!! ;) ;) ;) 

Monday, February 10, 2014

Marius the Giraffe's Life and The Worth of Human

Marius the Giraffe
Photo credit: EPA/Keld navntoft / February 7, 2014

Once again, I am witnessing how human life has been valued, by other human, less than animal. Does it make me a bad person if I did not want to live in this planet anymore, or at least with this petty human sub-group?

Seriously. You can muster all your thoughts and opinions about why Marius the giraffe shouldn't be killed, but the question remains: if, let's just say if, he was 'pardoned', what will you do about it? How you will ensure a healthy and happy life for him? Donations would be a good idea, either to provide him a proper permanent living place (giraffe haven on earth, probably) or send him away to another zoo. Yet, how much do you think it would cost? I assume transferring animals especially big ones like giraffes wouldn't come cheap, check out this link for ideas on how complicated animal transfers could be. Nor keeping them alive and healthy for a long time. Someone has been willing to donate 50,000 euros (roughly $68,000) for Marius' sake, so let's use that as a guidance. Based on UC Davis research, that number is enough to support 3 (yes, THREE) family of 4 for one whole year. Think about that, one giraffe's life and moving expenses is enough to support a total of 12 people; it is enough for a year of open opportunity for these people. Why is our priority so twisted?

Somehow, we think it is inhumane to kill cute animals and helpless children (or fetuses) regardless of the reason. People were literally wishing the doctor and the family of a brain-dead pregnant Texas woman to "Rot in Hell!!!" when they decided to cut her life support and allowing her unborn baby to die with her, even though it is said that the baby/fetus is not viable and the mother had been officially dead for weeks. Again, what will you do with the baby, if it was able to born? Will you provide the necessary funding for his/her life? How will you support him/her emotionally if he/she was born with congenital defects and have to spend his/her life in agony? And how will you help him/her to cope up with the emotional anguish when he/she knew that his/her mom was kept on life support even though she was already dead weeks before just to ensure he/she were viable and could be born?  And if he/she lives to the ripe age of, say 60 years old, can you make sure you are there for him/her since you are so insistent on keeping him/her alive? Those responsibilities sound daunting, don't you think?

Ah.... The sweet, sweet life....

It is time we understand that there is such thing as quality of life. Just walking, living, breathing in this earth does not mean it is enough. What is life if you have to live it without love and in fear the rest of your life, because you were born without love and in such poor living condition? What is life if it was so harsh and painful and sad you feel death is a much better option? What is life if you know that there is no way out of your current living condition and you will be forced to see your children live the same way you do and then their children and so forth because there is no way out? Tell me, is this life? Some (both whom had experienced such harshness and those who haven't) would say yes, and that life is indeed beautiful. But each person is different, how is it us to judge that people should indeed appreciate life to the fullest despite its hardness if we do not walk in their shoe? Some people indeed have shitty life, some did it to themselves and some were just born into unfortunate condition; how can we keep a straight face and say "You should appreciate your life!" when they themselves are so unhappy and sad and couldn't find anything worth living? Article 1 of the United Nations Universal Declaration of Human Rights said: All human beings are born free and equal in dignity and rights. Assuming this description is used to define the quality of life, how many of us already reach such state of bliss? Some people still think I am lesser because I am not from US. If you read comments on controversial articles (black vs white crime, illegal immigrants, LGBT etc), or any article in that matter, there are so many name calling in which each party derogate another party. Or in daily life, how many of you would smile genuinely to the person next to you even though he/she look intimidating or homeless or just weird? How many of you manage to not flinch when this intimidating/disheveled/unkempt person with the mad look in his/her eyes approach you for a change? And how many of you can give a mentally disabled person or a sad homeless man/woman a genuine hug because you too believe he/she is worth it, that he/she is still human?

And even if we can reach such state, to be free and equal in dignity and rights, it is still not enough. Human were given such advantages (e.g. speech, reasoning, manipulating with our limbs) not just so we can live our live in peace like some cows in the farms. It is not enough to just born-learn-being an adult-having family-die, we human need to make an impact on this world. Don't the Christian talked about this, about being the hands of God? And also Muslim and other religion. The religious group would say it is to spread the kindness of the Lord, but you can also see it (pragmatically) as a way to better ourselves. With kindness come understanding and empathy, and it is so much better (and whole lot easier) to live your life in peace as oppose to live it in fear and hatred. In Hindu we believe the deed we done in this life (karma) will go towards the next reincarnation. Who's to say that Marius' death was useless and not meant to happen? What if his death-for-science-and-food allow him to gain a bit more Karma point and he could be reincarnated into a better life, even as human perhaps? Life is about these chances, to better ourselves and the life of others around us. Have we manage to do this, to evolve into a better person and have a complete, fulfilling life? Can we say for sure, in our deathbed, that life is indeed grand and beautiful and we have no regret for anything? And if we did, have we ensure that others around us can do this too?

Nephew: Mom and Dad are the best!!!

After all said and done, the death threats seemed so unnecessarily childish. Even for the "offense" of dissecting it in front of audience and children, I personally think it is a great opportunity for the children to truly realize what a magnificent creature Marius was. Compare this to 8 or 9 year old who plays GTA V and see the violence in it, which do you think would be more beneficial to the child? Don't give me crap saying GTA has parental rating because I know how easy it is to override such rating, at least in Marius' dissection if the parents said no and refuse to take the child to the zoo the child wouldn't be able to see it at all (and even if the child manage to overcome the No part it is still a once-in-a-lifetime experience, as oppose to everyday access to video games). If you are worried about children getting whacked up because of Marius' dissection, worried about your own sons and daughters in this era of video game violence and overtly sexual experiences and harsh anonymous criticism on the internet. If you are angry about Marius getting killed even though he is healthy, be angry to anyone who didn't finish their food because it means the produce died in vain (yes, last time I checked even herbs and quinoa and veggies were alive before you eat them). If you are mad about a child's life ended before he/she was born because his/her mother decide to end it, mad about the harsh life that a lot of children has to endure because his/her mother decide to keep them (which includes smaller lunch and even had their lunch taken because their parents didn't pay the normal lunch fee). If you think a giraffe's life worth giving death threats to other people and make their life miserable, or if you think it is appropriate to call names to an already grieving family that were forced to lose the unborn child and its mother, or if you think you have the authority to force a child living a harsh difficult life just because you think life is precious, then you need to stop and think what really made you worthy as human. Empathy, love, kindness, and restrain; without these we are nothing but useless animal. Now, what are you?

PS: I am not Pro-abortion or Pro-life, I am pro-quality of life.; therefore I campaign about the importance of birth control method and the right for a child to have a father and a mother (translation: don't get a child when you are not ready, especially not with an asshole - and yes, women can be assholes too). I am not a vegan but I tried my hardest to make every part of the produce useful, because throwing out edible produce just because I had enough or not interested anymore is a great disrespect to the source animal/vegetable. And yes, I try to make the world a better place to live, at the very least for those around me. It's nice to have a goal in life.

Monday, February 3, 2014

Confession of 90 Days Fiancee - For Real Yo'

Taken from this forum,WARNING: it gets uglier with each new post.

Whoaaaa.... Wait... Whaaaaaat?????
Excuse me??? " Even living on welfare is a much better quality of life then some of these girls have known"??? Duuuudeeeee.... I live a much better life in Indonesia than I am now in the States!!!

Okay, that is not exactly true. Even though I missed my flavorful Indonesian food, my fellow countrymen's warmth and kindness, and also the breathtaking beauty of my country all round, here in the US I found what I've been looking for: a man to share my life with, a man that I love wholeheartedly and love me back in return. I still miss the ease of driving my scooter to catch the sunset after work and my less-then-a-dollar hearty meatball soup/bakso, but it's a price I'm willing to pay for my very own Prince Charming (who know my shoe size and preference instead of trying it around like a dumbass on the feet of every eligible lady in the country).

All the hubbub was about TLC's reality show '90-days Fiance'. Back in the day we saw their casting call on, and we were tempted to join in, thinking how fun it would be for us in the TV (don't judge me, I know you'd be excited as well). I watched an episode a few weeks ago and I am so very glad we are not there!!! How bad is it, you say? Well it was so bad that a friend told us that we would never get chosen anyway because we are not sketchy enough. Ouch. Yep, it was THAT bad. Then the articles and comments that followed (yes, I'm curious as a cat!) all were equally bad, which portrayed the women as green-card-digger [if there was ever such thing] and/or typical mail order bride. Yes, comments like the above. Or also the one that said: "For these women, some of them haven’t driven a car or used a dishwasher. So, when you ask why they might be motivated to move to the USA and live with one of these guys…I think it’s self-explanatory." Oh. My. God.

Now, if you are one of the people who just so happen to think that way based on the show, please take a seat and allow me to guide you through the whole ordeal. Rest assure that I was also a 90-days-fiance and this all are based on my own experience. I kinda know what I'm talking about. Sort of.

Comment from a friend: Dang! Do you need to send the condom wrapper too??

1. The visa is NOT get-to-know visa or will-we-be-married visa. You can only obtain the visa by paying a sum of money and submitting proof of relationship (include the proof that you have met each other at least once in the last 2 months years) and two declaration of intent to marry AND pass another interview (where you would be asked - again - about your relationship). The initial K1 visa submission, interview fee, medical exam fee, and airplane tickets costs us more than $2000.

2. The sponsor (i.e. the American citizen) is responsible for the foreign spouse, and have to be able to support the spouse financially (it's one of the requirements). And get this, once they got married and started the green card process, the sponsor HAS to support the foreign spouse even though they are separated. This is a very risky move and one that you would not attempt except when you are dumb and/or trust your foreign spouse completely.

3. It is highly suggested to get married before the 90 days are over. The moment you set foot in US, the clock started to tick; and it took time to prepare and send the paperwork for the next step after the marriage (applying for temporary green card). You can't afford to waste time to 'get-to-know-each-other' or even planning your wedding now and then, you just HAVE TO DO IT. Why? Because you can't risk all the time and effort and money you spent with deportation. We got married a month after I arrive and file in the paper the next month; the receipt came in a couple of weeks later just in time for our monthly visit to his hometown in another state. Without proper documentation I couldn't go outside California. And if I don't have proper documentation in say, Arizona, I'd be royally screwed.

Conclusion: you seriously won't attempt to apply for a K1 visa if you are not sure about your partner. I mean, seriously sure!

Now that you know that to obtain a K1 visa couple need to be really certain on the direction that they are heading (i.e. marrying one another), can you please please see that the couples portrayed in the show were either pretending to have these relationship issues or indeed just fail to grasp the concept of a marriage at all? Let's take the sexy Colombian for example, who wanted to move out from her husband-to-be's parents house and move in to their own apartment. Or the Filipino who had to endure criticism from an ex-wife and being questioned about how she would deal with the husband-to-be's sons. Like, if you are getting married to someone, won't this be already on the discussion board way before you decided to ditch everything you left behind and travel thousand of miles to the great unknown to marry that man of yours? And wouldn't you feel the same loss and out-of-place when you move to somewhere new, even in your own country? C'mon, admit it, someone who lived all his/her life in Juneau probably would take time to adjust him/herself when moving to Miami. When you stripped the women of this show from their nationality and try to pictured them as an American, you would see their struggle is not unique and it could happen to any American women.

You want me to leave? Seriously, you want me to leave??

But we all only want green card you say? Wowie. Yes. Yes, I have to admit I do want that green card. Not because I am infatuated with the country, but because I am infatuated with my husband and I want to be close to him. The one and a half year of our distance relationship was challenging and lonely, and if there is any way that I could ensure my presence on his side I would definitely go for it. Stripped from the fact that I am an Indonesian, our love is exactly like any 'normal' love: we debate, we love, we care for each other. And that is why I made the sacrifice to move to US and be with him. Not for the dishwasher or to drive a car, not even the welfare money. My salary in Indonesia was a mere $300 per month, but it's enough for me to live a good life, paid off my scooter, and (in my friend's case) even having a live-in maid to clean the house, cook, and babysit the kids. I worked with great companies who specifically cater to high-end clientele, and the lowest package I sell was around $1000 for 3 hours photo (which on peak season could happen almost every day); yet with such credential and my Bachelor degree in Medicine so far I couldn't get a job here in US, and I might have to short-sell myself and settle with minimum-wage job. And to think I used to be driven around in our company's luxury car, meeting clients on Bali's most exquisite resorts, making dreams come true and hope became reality. Sigh...

Sure, there are other exotic women who actually did 'hunt' for eligible foreign husband to make their life better. But please remember that there are others who, just like me, marry our husband because of love; and the delicious juicy scenes you saw on TLC's show could be nothing more than smokes and mirrors for your delight, just like Duck Dynasty's men's beard and camo suit. And if you still not convinced, have a go at the VisaJourney's forum that discuss about this show. As you can see from the forum, we are not mail-order-bride. It took to much of determination and effort for this ordeal. Seriously.

(Note to American: I am sorry that there are some of your citizen that reduce the greatness of your country to a mere dishwasher and 'ability to drive car'. Just so you know, I think your country is really cool. Rock on guys.)

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