This is America

I watched Childish Gambino's This is America, and I have to step back to take a breath.

Every time I read about crimes, pain, fear, and other bad things in the news, it hits me hard.

Every time I saw people on the street, homeless and cold, physically and/or mentally unwell, it hits me hard.

Each blow never got better. Each blow makes me want to bury my face in my hand and groan in mental pain, reeling to the anguish I felt.

Then I watch Childish Gambino's This is America. The blows are as fresh and as painful as both old and new ones.

There is so much pain and fear around, thick as a fog that obscures our vision, swirling like a monster tentacle that wrapped itself around our necks and torso, suffocating us.

I want to say it's going to get better. I want to say don't lose hope. I want to say they will be saved.

But I can't.

I don't know if it's going to get better. It's selfish to ask them to hold on to their shitty condition for the sake of 'hope'. And will any of us really go to get saved?

But I am here. I see you. You are not invisible. A little of me stays with you when I see you. 

This may sound like empty words, and nothing will change. And it is probably right.

But I am here. And just like me watching Childish Gambino's This is America, I am watching you. Thinking of you. Praying for you. And if I can, reach out my hands to you. I am here.