Gazebo

I helped my friend built her gazebo today. My friend was a total DIY girl and I learned a lot about tool names and their different usage, but I learned more than that.

Building that gazebo is like building a relationship. (Or is it the other way around?). There's so many parts and pieces. Some were obviously big enough to spot, some were small but mighty essential. Like the screws. You will get screwed for that.

There's sitting together trying to figure out which part goes where. There's the reading the manual together to ensure we both understand what the final product will be. There's a lot of goofing off on the start, only to panicking midway because it seems you wasted precious time.

Then there's the arguing which is the best way to do something. There's the accusations on who misplaced what. There's the tiredness and the feeling this is not going anywhere. There's doubt that you actually going to have it up/finish the project. Like, Ever.

But there's the introduction of new tools to make the project easier. There's the watching YouTube together for help. There's a moment where one realize the project should have been done in a different way, and the other accepted it. 

All of these requires acceptance, actually. Humbleness to understand one is not infallible. Respect for the other party and that their opinion matters too. That they might know and see things we don't. Trust to go the lengthy journey it takes to reach the finish line.

And one of the most important parts that I learned today is the ability to step back for a bit. We take turns to remind each other to take breaks. We also stopped after a certain time. We can keep going but we will be very tired and angry, and we will ended up having negative feeling towards the gazebo.

I mean why not? I am going to helped her to the very end. She knows this. The end goal is there. We see the almost finished product. We agreed on it. A little rest won't jeopardize our project. If anything, it lets us to enjoy the journey; to embrace the experience it offers.

My own gazebo is currently in ruins. It was half-finished and abandoned. I am still weeping knowing I will never see the finished product. I am still angry because I feel I wasted all those time and effort.

Yet it won't be in ruin forever. Once my tears dried I will disassemble this half-build project. I will salvage the parts, fix the ones I can fix, and looking into getting new parts that I can't salvage. And I will set everything in order, ready for the next time someone who wants to build it with me come along.

I will wait. Good things are worth waiting for. And yeah, I am kinda good.