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Friday, January 18, 2019

Blobfish



Yesterday at the gym I feel like I was a blobfish in a tank full of beautiful, tropical fish. Everyone seemed to be hella attractive, and they can do all these fancy stretching moves while I struggle with a simple plank. I looked down at my jelly roll and feel I would need millenias to be where they are right now.

Even as I started my app for stretching, a part of me grudgingly suggested to just go and get some pizza or gelato. Not a very hard thing to do since my gym is located in a mall. I tried to focus on my exercises instead. I forced myself to feel the strain on my body, as opposed to what I couldn't become.

By the end of the night, I was still feeling like a blobfish. A blobfish that was drenched in endorphins after a good workout, and so ready for a good night sleep. I may be a blobfish but I feel good about myself, and that's what counts.

I want to tell you that if you work hard you can transform into the prettiest butterfly, but that's not how it works. Can I be transformed into one of those tropical fish? Yes, I believe so. I just don't have the time and patience for it. I choose not to. Some people just can't, for various reason.

Focus on what we want to become is good. We all need that motivation in our lives. Yet many times that motivation becomes a chain that held us back: "I'll never be that good enough, anyway. What's the use?" The answer to that is: "Because the effort makes you feel good about yourself".

There are pride and joy in overcoming obstacles, in knowing we push ourselves just a little bit over the edge and yet we survived. There's gaining confidence in realizing we manage to better ourselves, be it the one extra pushup or the one extra client. 

Don't waste your time feeling sorry that you are not the sparkling Angel Fish. If you are a blobfish, so be it. Focus on what makes you feel good, what makes you better. And yes, it sucks to be a blobfish. That doesn't mean you can't feel good about yourself.

I am still envious with the attractive people, and I know one of these days it will hit me again. I will be ready, though. Side lunge left. Side lunge right. Forward bend. Jumping jacks. Repeat. Focus. Focus. Focus.

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