I am not young enough to know everything
This aching bone, this sunken cheeks
This leathery skin, this wilted flesh
This bliurred memories and dim vision
Gone were the days when i am young
A sprightly youth, a tender soul
Eyes that see things, mind that is open
And the beautiful, beautiful experiences
Every muscle knows something,
memorizing it clearly from my movement
Every gaze reveals something,
Understanding it from my experience
Lo and behold, i know things!
Fear and pain have not bind me yet
And neither do pessimism and doubts
And thus, I truly know things
The beauty of the world
Its wonder experienced in all my senses
The delight to be a part of life
Oh how good it is to be young!
But now I'm old, and I forget
The knowledge flickers and dims like an old light
It swarmed me like the morning fog
Cold and shapeless, a fraction of dream
Will I ever be back again?
Will I ever know things again?
Curse this age and the life I live
Curse the pain and dissapointment that broke my wings
My child wanders around freely
Smile on his face and laughters galore
Experiencing things, knowing things
Understanding things in life and enjoying it
But not me
I am not young enough to know everything
A little bit of this, a little bit of that, and all the things the cat sees along her way
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Saturday, November 2, 2013
Friday, November 1, 2013
Bust That Bust-y Move!
"The part of a woman’s body men look at the most?
I hope you are sitting down, because I'm about to give you the shock of your life...."
And according to the said article, the answer is....... Breasts!!!
Yes, yes, feel free to bump your head in unison to the desk.
I hope the writer was joking or she was being sarcastic, because I seriously doubt that this comes a shock to anyone. I mean, even a blooming adolescent (a.k.a teenager) would know that. It is difficult not to gaze upon those little hills (or to depict Pamela Anderson's or Christina Hendrick's: the huge treasure chests). Even for the slow thinker, you must have realize by now there is indeed a reason why women selfies on the internet (or ones that you receive/sent) almost always include these handful part of the bodies. And yes, there is also a reason why boob job is always in popular demand. This is no mystery of life, this is common knowledge.
That asides, the reason I wrote with puns and sexual innuendo is because I don't understand why looking at boobies is widely frowned upon. As the article say, women also look at other women's chest too. I know I do, and I notice my girl friends do too. Well, some of them look at their shoes and hairdo first, each to each own I guess. But for men, well... Quoting the article: "Men look at chests and waists for longer periods of time than they look at faces." Chests and waists are the tell-tale sign of how reproductive a woman is, at least theoretically. Thus it actually make sense if men in general look at women like that. I would be very surprised (and totally freaked out) if a man come to me and said lustily: "You have a very sexy thumb, it arouses me...". This, of course, still a plausible scenario; but again, each to each own.
Which brings me to another side of the booby-trap, the discomfort and unpleasantness women often feel when men ogling their chests. Men (and some women too), I just want to tell you that although I can understand you throwing glances at a woman's chests, you are not supposed to stare them to eternity. Appreciative glances are ok, the "You... Me... Tonight..." glances are never ok (and ladies, you are welcome to call the police or take action for this). Imagine if someone stare at the bulk in your groin for like a whole minute or more, what would you feel? (I assume the lot of you men would feel uncomfortable, but for those individuals that cherish the pleasure, you're welcome).
Am I being malicious towards my fellow women? Heck no! If you think women wouldn't notice Christian Bale or Channing Tatum crossing the street topless then you got us soooo wrong. I believe that women is also appreciative to men's body, but we just don't show it as open as our male counterpart. Therefore I see no reason why men can't check out women's body, because sure as hell we can check out theirs as well. This is what equality is all about. What confuses me is women who dressed up in low-neck shirts that accentuate their chests, and then complained about being ogled and stated: "I am more than just a set of boobs you know!!". Uhhh.... well then cover up and let me see what you got, because Thelma and Louise kinda distracting me. Yes by the way, I am a straight woman, thanks for asking. It is similar to a man who decked out with fancy suit and expensive cars (and platinum cards, woohoo!!) and moaned: "I am more than just a stack of money." Yes honey, sure you are, by the way those earrings at Tiffany would look awesome on me, don't you think? Or a man with six pack abs and a killer smile who is so hot he could melt Sauron's ring in a flash: "I am just an ordinary man. I have feelings too." Sure love, I totally get it. What's your phone number again?
In a shell, given a chance I think women would do exactly what men would do in terms of appreciating the opposite gender's body. Thus unless it is become displeasing and worrisome (seriously, ogling on us too long and make lewd comments or offensive gesture is just so tactless and worth a visit - your visit - to the police), I think people should just chill out with this busty-move, especially in terms of relationship. A lot of women got hung up if they found their partner checking out or complementing other women. I don't think your partner would leave you just because he found other people's breasts fascinating (but if he specifically offer you a boob job to fit his fantasies, you might want to leave him. Or not. Depends whether you want the free boob job or not). If we women get faint and woozy after a seeing Ryan Gosling or Hugh Jackman, let the men have their own fun too. The borderline is, in my opinion, when it becomes disrespectful towards you as the video below comically portray. I mean like, d'oh.
I have boobies and I don't like when people being disrespectful towards me because of them. I don't like when people disrespectful towards me in general, especially for things that I couldn't (and/or wouldn't) change such as my race, my age, my skin color, my nationality, my body shape and size, and all that jazz. I really think that is all there is to it. The issue is not about ogling at boobies, the issue is being respectful vs disrespectful; and as I stated above, the line is pretty clear. We know you guys are fascinated by us, but keep it civil and respectful kay. We'll respect you even more for that, even though you don't have the six pack abs or the legendary Black Amex. See, us women can be judgmental too if we want ;)
I hope you are sitting down, because I'm about to give you the shock of your life...."
And according to the said article, the answer is....... Breasts!!!
Yes, yes, feel free to bump your head in unison to the desk.
Elvira, the only character I know that successfully match her boobs and her personality
I hope the writer was joking or she was being sarcastic, because I seriously doubt that this comes a shock to anyone. I mean, even a blooming adolescent (a.k.a teenager) would know that. It is difficult not to gaze upon those little hills (or to depict Pamela Anderson's or Christina Hendrick's: the huge treasure chests). Even for the slow thinker, you must have realize by now there is indeed a reason why women selfies on the internet (or ones that you receive/sent) almost always include these handful part of the bodies. And yes, there is also a reason why boob job is always in popular demand. This is no mystery of life, this is common knowledge.
That asides, the reason I wrote with puns and sexual innuendo is because I don't understand why looking at boobies is widely frowned upon. As the article say, women also look at other women's chest too. I know I do, and I notice my girl friends do too. Well, some of them look at their shoes and hairdo first, each to each own I guess. But for men, well... Quoting the article: "Men look at chests and waists for longer periods of time than they look at faces." Chests and waists are the tell-tale sign of how reproductive a woman is, at least theoretically. Thus it actually make sense if men in general look at women like that. I would be very surprised (and totally freaked out) if a man come to me and said lustily: "You have a very sexy thumb, it arouses me...". This, of course, still a plausible scenario; but again, each to each own.
Here's a picture of my thumb. You are welcome.
Which brings me to another side of the booby-trap, the discomfort and unpleasantness women often feel when men ogling their chests. Men (and some women too), I just want to tell you that although I can understand you throwing glances at a woman's chests, you are not supposed to stare them to eternity. Appreciative glances are ok, the "You... Me... Tonight..." glances are never ok (and ladies, you are welcome to call the police or take action for this). Imagine if someone stare at the bulk in your groin for like a whole minute or more, what would you feel? (I assume the lot of you men would feel uncomfortable, but for those individuals that cherish the pleasure, you're welcome).
Am I being malicious towards my fellow women? Heck no! If you think women wouldn't notice Christian Bale or Channing Tatum crossing the street topless then you got us soooo wrong. I believe that women is also appreciative to men's body, but we just don't show it as open as our male counterpart. Therefore I see no reason why men can't check out women's body, because sure as hell we can check out theirs as well. This is what equality is all about. What confuses me is women who dressed up in low-neck shirts that accentuate their chests, and then complained about being ogled and stated: "I am more than just a set of boobs you know!!". Uhhh.... well then cover up and let me see what you got, because Thelma and Louise kinda distracting me. Yes by the way, I am a straight woman, thanks for asking. It is similar to a man who decked out with fancy suit and expensive cars (and platinum cards, woohoo!!) and moaned: "I am more than just a stack of money." Yes honey, sure you are, by the way those earrings at Tiffany would look awesome on me, don't you think? Or a man with six pack abs and a killer smile who is so hot he could melt Sauron's ring in a flash: "I am just an ordinary man. I have feelings too." Sure love, I totally get it. What's your phone number again?
We. Must. Not. Ogle
We. Must. Not. Ogle
We. Must. Not...
OMIGOD!!!!
In a shell, given a chance I think women would do exactly what men would do in terms of appreciating the opposite gender's body. Thus unless it is become displeasing and worrisome (seriously, ogling on us too long and make lewd comments or offensive gesture is just so tactless and worth a visit - your visit - to the police), I think people should just chill out with this busty-move, especially in terms of relationship. A lot of women got hung up if they found their partner checking out or complementing other women. I don't think your partner would leave you just because he found other people's breasts fascinating (but if he specifically offer you a boob job to fit his fantasies, you might want to leave him. Or not. Depends whether you want the free boob job or not). If we women get faint and woozy after a seeing Ryan Gosling or Hugh Jackman, let the men have their own fun too. The borderline is, in my opinion, when it becomes disrespectful towards you as the video below comically portray. I mean like, d'oh.
I have boobies and I don't like when people being disrespectful towards me because of them. I don't like when people disrespectful towards me in general, especially for things that I couldn't (and/or wouldn't) change such as my race, my age, my skin color, my nationality, my body shape and size, and all that jazz. I really think that is all there is to it. The issue is not about ogling at boobies, the issue is being respectful vs disrespectful; and as I stated above, the line is pretty clear. We know you guys are fascinated by us, but keep it civil and respectful kay. We'll respect you even more for that, even though you don't have the six pack abs or the legendary Black Amex. See, us women can be judgmental too if we want ;)
Tersandera Buruh dan Tenaga Domestik
Kisruh soal gaji buruh bikin saya teringat "episode" saat salah satu bos saya mencari pembantu baru, kebetulan teman saya yang bertugas mewawancara:
Teman: Gajinya minta berapa mbak?
Pelamar: 800 ribu bersih. Ini ngga termasuk uang kos, cicilan motor, makan dan biaya sehari-hari saya.
Teman: Hah? uang kos dan makan juga kita yang tanggung? Total berapa mbak?
Pelamar: Yah, sekitar 2 juta. Iya, itu semua situ yangg tanggung. Kan situ ga nyari pembantu yang tinggal dalam
Teman: Kalau tinggal dalam minta berapa mbak?
Pelamar: Saya ga mau kalau tinggal dalam
Teman: Oh... Emm... Humm.... (shock)
Pelamar: Oh ya, pulsa juga ya
Teman: Kok tinggi banget mbak mintanya?
Pelamar: Biasa saya kerja sama bule dibayar segitu. Kalau situ ga sanggup ya ga usah.
Teman: Hee???????????????
Di Bali, lebih sakit hati mencari tenaga kerja rumah tangga (pembantu, sopir, dll) daripada mencari tenaga kantoran. Kalaupun ada, gaji yang diminta selalu selangit dengan alasan orang bule bayar mereka lebih mahal, padahal hasil kerja mereka sering kali dibawah standar. Ini satu lagi alasan mereka, beberapa kali saya menghadapi pelamar yang dengan tegas mengatakan mereka tidak mau kerja kalau tidak dengan bos bule, karena bule lebih royal dan ga banyak cing cong. Intinya mau gaji besar tapi tidak mau kerja maksimal. Waduh... Sementara satu kali ada seorang pelamar yang baru saja selesai kerja di hotel berbintang di Afrika Selatan dengan posisi yang cukup tinggi. Teman saya sampai gemetaran mewawancara orang ini, karena ia melamar untuk posisi sopir. Waktu ditanya kenapa, dia bilang dia asal bisa kerja saja sambil menunggu jawaban untuk lamarannya ke berbagai hotel. Teman saya mengingatkan bahwa pekerjaan ini "kasar", karena termasuk cuci mobil dan sebagainya, dan dia cuma tersenyum dan bilang: yang penting kerja mbak. Sayangnya kami tidak bisa menerima orang ini karena dia over qualified dan kami butuh driver yang permanen.
Kalau dipikir-pikir ironis sekali, seberapa sering sih kita yang pegang ijazah saat wawancara bisa dengan pedenya bersikap: "Kalau loe ga sanggup hire gue ya ga usah!" dan mendikte bos kita? Seberapa sering sih kita dipertahankan di perusahaan walau kelakuan kita jelek banget dan hasil kerja kita ga beres? Si bapak yang pernah kerja di AfSel saja mau humble dan mengerti ia butuh pekerjaan, sementara si mbok yang cuma bisa ngetik SMS berani belagu dan menuntut ini itu. Kayanya kita yang pekerja kantoran bisa diganti dengan amat sangat mudah, kayanya kita ga ada artinya. Ironis bahwa kita yang bekerja keras dan mengeluarkan uang yang tidak sedikit untuk pendidikan punya nilai jual yang lebih rendah daripada tenaga domestik yang pendidikannya SMA.
Saya selalu respek dengan tenaga domestik. Waktu saya kecil keluarga saya selalu punya Mbok yang membantu mama dirumah. Biasanya Mbok-mbok ini datang benar-benar tidak tahu apa-apa, dan setelah setahun-dua kerja di rumah saya "lulus" dengan pengetahuan penuh: memasak, memakai mesin cuci, dsb; mereka lalu bisa mendapatkan pekerjaan yang gajinya lebih bagus. Ini yang saya hargai, niat untuk memperbaiki diri, bukan cuma menuntut hak tapi juga melakukan kewajiban. Sayangnya mbok-mbok sekarang lebih hobi pegang hape daripada kerja, karena tau ibu-ibu yang desperate untuk bantuan mereka ga akan berani protes rumah kurang bersih etc karena kalau bukan mereka mau cari dimana lagi? Buat saya, ini rasanya kaya pemerasan banget. Begitu halnya dengan buruh. Kita butuh mereka, mereka butuh pekerjaan, tapi kenapa mereka yang mendikte kita? Yang anarkis dan mengancam kita? Kalau kita ga mau pakai mereka, mereka juga rugi kok. Saya merasa tersandera dengan orang-orang ini.
Di Amerika, tenaga pembantu domestik atau kerennya domestic cleaning service itu muahal, $100/2 jam, misalnya saja tempat ini. Tapi hasilnya jangan ditanya, rapi jali bo'! Ini yang resmi ya, yang berijin dll. Namun banyak juga imigran yang menawarkan jasa mereka lebih murah (ini tanpa ijin ya), masalahnya kebanyakan dari mereka bahkan tidak bisa bahasa Inggris, dan kalau ada apa-apa juga sulit lapor ke polisi karena banyak dari mereka yang sebenarnya imigran ilegal. Seandainya saja di Indonesia ada yang model begini: yang bisa direview dan perusahaannya benar-benar service oriented. Atau persatuan buruh yang isinya tenaga-tenaga buruh profesional yang kerjanya efisien dan cepat mengerti. Kalau pembantu banyak sih seperti itu, tapi biasanya yang ada di Indonesia cuma mentarget seberapa banyak pembantu yang bisa "keluar"; begitu pula persatuan buruh yang saya sebut, itu ada dan istilahnya outsourcing, yang lagi-lagi cuma bikin buruh/membernya sapi perahan.
Saya pendukung berat persamaan derajat dan membantu kaum miskin, tapi sori banget, sudah ga jaman lagi demo-demo minta gaji besar dengan pendidikan minim (dan hasil kerja yang mengenaskan). Miris banget kan membaca mereka minta gaji sampai 4 juta, tapi "anggaran pendidikan" mereka cuma Rp 15,000 untuk beli koran/tabloid. Itu cuma dapat 2 tabloid lho, karena koran saja harganya Rp 3,000 seharinya. Apa sih yang bisa dipelajari dari tabloid Indonesia? Bola, motor, atau gosip? Buat saya argumen "wong cilik" mereka patah begitu mereka menuntut rumah 3 petak, belanja baju Rp 300,000 per bulan, dan makan diluar (plus susu, kopi, teh, dan buah) tiap hari. Ini bukan "wong cilik" lagi, yang pegawai kantoran saja tidak bisa hidup seenak ini. Bukan "wong cilik" kalau bilang jumlah sekian "penghinaan" karena banyak masyarakat Indonesia yang cukup atau bahkan sangat bahagia dapat gaji 2,4 juta rupiah. Dan kalau mereka merasa berhak dapat gaji sekian, maka sopir mikrolet metromini dan angkot lainnya juga berhak dapat gaji/pendapatan sekian karena mereka juga "wong cilik". Siap-siap deh ongkos angkot naik, eh tapi nanti mas-mas tercinta butuh kenaikan lagi dong... Emang loe pikir duit cuma tinggal nyetak aja??? Argumen "wong cilik" mereka juga jelas patah begitu mereka melakukan tindakan anarkis atau merugikan masyarakat luas. Sori bro, gue kesian kalau hidup loe susah, tapi jangan nyerang atau nyalahin gue kalau loe sirik sama hidup gue, jangan maksa gue nanggung defisit hidup loe dan bikin loe punya hal-hal yang gw punya. Gue ga nyolong dari elo ato nyusahin elo kok!
Yang Indonesia butuhkan adalah keprofesionalan, dan orang-orang yang service oriented. Saya membayangkan di Indonesia ada grup tenaga domestik yang dikontrol ketat, yang hasil kerjanya memuaskan dan bisa dipercaya; tidak masalah kalau yang bisa dilayani hanya segelintir orang, karena dengan sendirinya grup ini akan selalu dicari dan bisa pasang harga lebih mahal. Begitu pula dengan tenaga buruh atau pekerja lainnya, yang isinya orang-orang yang secara aktif memajukan diri mereka misalnya belajar komputer, bahasa asing, dan lain-lain. Istilahnya, kalau anda tidak oke dalam pekerjaan anda (walaupun itu kerja kasar sekalipun), maka good bye selamat tinggal. Jeleknya mimpi ini adalah, bila terwujud maka tenaga domestik tidak terjangkau lagi bagi kebanyakan masyarakat Indonesia (sekarang pun sudah sulit sebenarnya). Tapi serius, apa anda benar-benar rela dipaksa membayar mahal untuk hasil kerja yang tidak seberapa? Sudah saatnya pistol itu diturunkan. Saya bosan disandera seperti ini.
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