Cancel Culture

I think the scariest part about the last 4 months (March to present June) is the absolutism of everything. You cannot deviate. Ever.

How dare you thinking that the lockdown is awful. You valued profit more than human life.

How dare you thinking that the riot and looting is unnecessary. You valued big companies more than human rights.

How dare you not denouncing the police. You valued your own privilege more than systemic injustice.

How dare you not speak up with the predetermined hashtag and show us your ignorance for the cause. You valued your lily white ass more than those who are in need.

For the record, my ass is what Indonesian called as burik (mottled) and langu (bluish black). It is still pretty, but definitely not lily white.

It is most visible in social media and the news. You say something against the grain and you got swamped, schooled and made as if you are the worst person alive. Hashtag cancel culture. You delete the comment, apologize, and all is well again. One more person finally understand the gravity of the situation. Yay!

The problem is, they don't. Just because they delete the post and apologize doesn't mean they changed their mind. Just because they don't speak their opinion publicly doesn't mean they didn't share their opinion or news that reinforced their opinion with trustworthy like-minded people. Just because they are publicly banned for their belief, that doesn't mean they will stop believing it.

If you take away the context and see it as it is, what does it tell you? It is the lost of free speech. The argument is you can say what you want to say but others have the right to feel a certain way about it, and thus your free speech is not without consequence. But where does that consequence start? For attacking other people or for having different opinion?

It reminds me of the time where Indonesia was ruled by the tyrant Soeharto. We can only whisper among ourselves of the injustice he did, while the government-controlled media keep blasting how great the country condition was when it actually wasn't. Or the current time when the religious majority keep forcing us the religious minority to feel a certain way and government backed them up.

The penalty for speaking against these ruling parties could be severe. It could cost you your job, your family, and even your life. We've had police chief made to beg for forgiveness to a religious leader for breaking up non-sanctioned mass prayer activity during the Covid-19 pandemic. When the threat of 'consequence' such as this is hanged on top of your head, is it really free speech?

US and its cancel culture have moved steadfastly towards this. A single comment against the mass and woosh, there goes your life. This is not only reserved for celebrities or public persona. I have seen friends, all commoners, who have to delete their social media posts because the backlash they received. I have seen friends who got unfriended and branded as 'Bad Person™ ' because they questioned the general beliefs.

This absolutism does not educate. If anything, it is pushing people away further from your cause. If somebody in real life is yelling at your face about what you should do and how you should feel, you will most likely just shrug your shoulder and walked away. What's in it for you to stay and be yelled at?

Worse, you will start gathering evidence to justify your belief to defend yourself, and without a proper check and balance (why should you, people don't bother check and balance their cause without yelling it at you) you can easily turned into another absolutism. This time for your own belief.

You can't make someone believe in your cause, in your belief, by telling them it is wrong to not believe it. If you really want to convert someone to your cause, you listen. You talk to them and allow them to tell you what they think, their fear and worry. Then you use that knowledge to see if your belief actually fits to their perspective, and if yes, tailor-made your explanation to ease their fear and worry.

This is true across the board. Whatever party you choose. Whatever belief you have. It can be as simple as why pineapple shouldn't be on pizza or why you need to show support for a cause. It also, however, requires us to be humble yet in full understanding of our cause. If you don't want to talk about it for fear of being challenged, then you are an issue.

It is easier to brand somebody as 'Bad Person™ ' than to do all this. But why would you? If the issue is something that is important to you, won't it make more sense to gather more ally than to dismissed it as We vs You? I know that it will make you feel like you are in the right, and thus a sense of control. But is this about your cause or is it about your ego?

It also reminds me of the phrase "Let him who is without sin cast the first stone". How do you know that you did not do the same sin or act the same way to other people? I have seen people who despise people that are against LGBTQ and honestly they are acting more hateful than the actual people who, well, against LGBTQ. You have people who are "Well, I don't agree with it but I won't treat them differently" and people who are "BOYCOTT THIS ANTI-LGBTQ PERSON AND LET US NEVER SPEAK OF THEIR NAME AGAIN".

We have gone so far as a species. We want equality. We want justice. We want all of this even when we are not the ones that are hurting. This shows how much compassion we have for others, something that most species can't comprehend. We just need to make sure our ego does not take us away from our cause and learn to respect other people's opinion. And yes, we can agree to disagree.