On The Altar of God I Kneeled

On the altar of God I kneeled

Eyes wide in horror

Lips slightly opened in desperation

A singular tear fell down my cheek

Too stricken to cry some more

"Please…" I called in a whisper

"Please…" My voice rasped with pain

"Please help us…" I said inaudibly

Too devastated to say it out loud

The anguish of the world rushed upon me

Drowning me, waves after waves

I struggled to breathe, to keep my sanity

Yet there is too much pain

Too much sadness

Too much loss and defeats

"Please…" I whisper again

"I beg you…" The eyes grew wider in fear

"Help us, please… I beg you…"

Then the head hung down

Embarrassed for asking such favor

Rejected for knowing no answer would come

Why would salvation come?

We have forsaken ourselves so far and so thorough

Heaven's doors are barred against us

No help will come

Only pain. Only defeat. Only suffering.

As we walk through this earth devouring others

Quenching our insane appetite for the hole we can't close

Forgetting the beautiful being we are

We're doomed. We're dead.

On the altar of God I kneeled

Forcing myself to smile

Why end things in frown and in ugliness

If you can end it with grace and beauty

The corner of my lips rose slowly

And then the tears run freely

There is beauty everywhere

There is love and kindness and hope

Why did I forget about that

The darkness around me accentuated the light in me

How bright it shone, how pretty it looked

And I don't need help anymore

I don't care about salvation or promises of heaven

This is me, and this is my world

The tears that have fallen

The blood that has shed

The souls that have been lost

The hearts that have been broken

This is my world, this is who I am

Good or wretched, beautiful or ugly

I will live on

I lifted my chin up high

Straighten out my back in defiance

 "Thank you," I said loud and clear

"Thank you for the life You given me"

"Thank you for the world You created"

"Thank you for the lessons and trials"

"Thank you for who I am"

And with that, I bowed deeply

On the altar of God I kneeled

I lost myself but now I've found me back

I was drowned in despair but now I walk on it

I was blinded by pain but now I see clearly

For this is my life

For this is my world

For this is my people

And I won't back down

There will still be pain and anguish

There will still be heartache and misery

There will still be darkness all around

But there will be hope

There will be light flickering in our soul

The little candle that others hold on to

The singular light that guides us through the storm

The promise of safety among the wretchedness

Let there be light in us

Let there be hope

Let there be love in us

Let there be haven

I smiled even bigger

A smile that turned into a grin

A grin that turned into a chuckle

A chuckle that turned into a hearty laughter

This is my life which I will fight for

This is my world which I will protect

These are my people whom I shall love

On the altar of God I kneeled solemnly

And say "Thank you, Lord," with a loving smile